Dr. Jekyll, Mr. Hyde, or the opposing realities of the western "traveller"

I sat down this afternoon in the only cafe in Pucón that makes a decent espresso, I got my pen and leatherbound notebook out and began to write - this is, with only a few minor modifications, what I wrote down.

In the past 5 to 7 years of my life I have become increasingly aware of what I believe to be the intrinsically schizophrenic nature of human beings, the double personality. Or perhaps of my own conscience. Yes, the divide exists within me and I am about to project it, by way of this page, (or screen if you will) onto the rest of humanity.
This schism I have realized, - after much thought, much distillation and separation of ideas, causes, effects, side effects and so on - revolves primarily around the existence of two separate human consciousness´(if thats a word). It belongs in the dual realization that I am me and I will exist for a short time on this planet - I am unique; and conversely that I am merely a small peice of the infinite puzzle that is life and existance. I am only a piece and as such play an important role ie. I have distinct moral and ethical responsibilities and duties.
To bring this back to earth a bit I shall explain how this manifests itself and has manifested itself in my thoughts over the years and most strongly in the time leading up to my trip here.
Travelling is, on the one hand a way of realizing growth (spiritual, mental, cultural), of learning, of enjoying - it should be the definition of the pursuit of all these things and many more, related to human growth. This sort of growth is important for me and indeed for anybody who wants to develop as a human being.
However on the other hand I/everyone has a responsibility to eachother and to the planet and I find myself asking if this pursuit of "happiness", "good", "growth", and "knowledge" is either sustainable or responsible in relation to the rest of the human population as well as plants, animals and the bzillions of systems and ecosystems of the planet. In the endI have decided that it is not sustainable or necesarily good in a utilitarian sense... I have also, predictably and selfishly, put myself before all else and continued in this ignoble pursuit anyway.
However, with some notable alterations to my actions and attitudes, in order to mitigate, at least mildly, the consequences of my actions. (or perhaps better said, to create the illusion, like catholic confession, of "absolving" myself of guilt). Instead of listing these changes, I shall describe the sort of "traveller" or "tourist" that makes me question the purported advantages and possibilities of spiritual/mental/emotional growth of my own endeavours.
Another negative factor remains that, while it is magnified even further here in Pucon, I feel that the majority of "tourists" or "travellers" are like this:
They leave their country looking to relax; not just physically but mentally and emotionally too. They come, as all the promotional posters say, to disconnect from their stressful lives and enjoy relaxing, flawless and stress-free "travel". The problem with this is that all of the burden and responsibility has to fall on somebody and the native populations of the "visited" countries have the misfortune of being recipient to this onslaught of ignorant post-modern epicureanists. The tourist unloads the responsibility of communication, cultural understanding and action upon the resident population. (Sure there is an industry involved here that profits from these people but that does not detract from the moral argument). Even in long stays this tourist does not bother to learn the language, which, while not everything, is extremely important. Indeed, comprehension of a language is absolutely essencial in the understanding of another culture as it sheds light on religion, culture, spirituality (as distinct from dogmatic religion), superstition, customs, culinary habits, cultural attitudes (as they relate to both human society and to our relationship with the earth).
It seems that all the concepts we had mentioned above like education, spiritual and cultural growth, knowledge, personal growth - they all fall away leaving one single goal - naked and unaccompanied this single goal is indicative of the ignorant and selfish culture in which we have grown and shows a complete disregard for the interconnectedness of humankind - everything is me, me, me! This single goal is pleasure! And travelling becomes a list: this is why people can rush around an entire continent in 2 months and say that they "did" South America.
With all else stripped away, this pursuit is not only destructive to the "visited" but is in its hollow form, destructive and sapping to the "visiter"- in effect they gleen a mere fraction of what they could from their spacial and temporal experiences. (they are not experiencing or living fully). This, I have to say, is an insular, selfish and ignorant attitude towar travel which cuts off the arteries that feed , to use a tired metaphor, the growth of the heart. (These last words sound judgemental but I promise that they are not, they are observational!)

Instead of feeling selfrighteous about the way in which I choose to travel, every time I see tourists like the above mentioned, I question and evaluate my own motives, actions, and form of travel. It is not that I must like or enjoy or love everything that happens or everything that I see, rather that I must live it, bad good beautiful sad sorry pleasing... etc. They are all bumps in the road!

That was heavy and long!!!
but thats all for now!!!