My clothes are not in my house. I wander around these cold-looking, heated rooms in longjohns. I get close to the door and I cannot go any further. Custom Custom Custom. I feel the less and less accepting eyes. A law of proportions - further from my bedroom, weirder looks.
Cannot go to work, cannot change that the water cut out last night. This is not a physical reality, but a social. Think about that for a moment. I have no pants, longjohns and tights are the name of the game but unless Im running or skiing, forget it...
I have to sit here, read about civilizing missionaries and the savages of this land, and watch the tour de france... a mixed sentence... A freedom so limited that it is constricting... but imagine this for a moment that you are trapped, mobility 20 meters in any direction, but there are no physical boundaries, none! The land the mountains the sky the sea are the apparent limits but you try to move and the eyes stop you, like lazer beams. Not even eyes, just thoughts and social constructions...
Maybe what we think is freedom is not at all... Maybe this virtual, socail fence surrounds us to limit our capabilities...Think about that...
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Monday, July 19, 2010
Notable changes
I have always felt it curious but not unnatural, that as one´s surroundings and routines begin to stabilize, to become more predictable, one enters into a rhythm that does not allow for a creative process. Routine becomes stronger, harder and less permeable until, while in some other time change was every second, change becomes almost impossible - one becomes rigid.
I hardly want to admit that I am writing in this vein (sp?) that is that given all the changes that have happened in the past week, things that have built up, exploded, fallen and melted away. But it is true.
After more than a month of "pelotudeando" (rough translation: fucking around) with the club Andino, I finally gave a class to a young physed teacher. An hour and a half, it went well. We shook on the agreement. It wasn´t until after though that I realized that I would only give a class if Santi (the full time instructor)was already giving one, or was absent... prognostic...bad... Then I saw the list of classes and saw that the first class was a "test" and I would not be paid for it... so I confronted, very politely and logically Pablo, the guy who hired me. And he sent me a rather vitriolic email telling me he was tired of my complaining and my confrontation and he was getting to know my personality pretty well and he didn´t like it!
Recap: Pablo invited me to be an instructor, told me he would have equipment for me (I had to buy my own), he encouraged me to change my flight etc. and then didn´t want to pay me the class...
Thankfully though, I went up the the club the next day to train and nobody seemed to care - the people I had begun to make friends with were just as nice and jolly - I was told by a friend that Pablo is a bitter, egotistical guy...
So I made my way to the Winter sports centre Las Cotorras, beside the ski centre. When we drive in in the morning, the mountains are painted pink and purple with the sunrise and in the deep valley clouds obscure everything, sitting there under the sky-scraping coloured peaks so that when we emerge from these clouds it is like a dream, a crisp perfect dream that is blurred and almost forgotten in the morning. I have been there this week, with the rain, the rain that washes away and softens the trails. Yesterday could have been a summer day in Ushuaia...17 degrees!!! at least three maybe four days of the past week and a half I have trained in short sleeve shirt and no gloves... turns out that this time I picked the right place because Las Cotorras is the only xcountry trails with snow... all the rest have closed...
And today? more changes! I woke up with a stomach ache called in sick to work and now it is snowing a blizzard!!!
There is a David Bowie song about Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes - And that song is playing in my head. And I´m taking a day off from work and training (im sort of burnt out) and just sitting around watching the tour de france and preparing for the english classes im giving in the hostel...
These are the rapid succession of changes that solicited this blog - a rather boring one at that.
a note for skiers - yesterday the wind was so strong (they closed the downhill centre, must have been gusting close to 100km/h) that I had to offset into the wind on the flat!! and coming back the other way I free-skated, no poles!!
I hardly want to admit that I am writing in this vein (sp?) that is that given all the changes that have happened in the past week, things that have built up, exploded, fallen and melted away. But it is true.
After more than a month of "pelotudeando" (rough translation: fucking around) with the club Andino, I finally gave a class to a young physed teacher. An hour and a half, it went well. We shook on the agreement. It wasn´t until after though that I realized that I would only give a class if Santi (the full time instructor)was already giving one, or was absent... prognostic...bad... Then I saw the list of classes and saw that the first class was a "test" and I would not be paid for it... so I confronted, very politely and logically Pablo, the guy who hired me. And he sent me a rather vitriolic email telling me he was tired of my complaining and my confrontation and he was getting to know my personality pretty well and he didn´t like it!
Recap: Pablo invited me to be an instructor, told me he would have equipment for me (I had to buy my own), he encouraged me to change my flight etc. and then didn´t want to pay me the class...
Thankfully though, I went up the the club the next day to train and nobody seemed to care - the people I had begun to make friends with were just as nice and jolly - I was told by a friend that Pablo is a bitter, egotistical guy...
So I made my way to the Winter sports centre Las Cotorras, beside the ski centre. When we drive in in the morning, the mountains are painted pink and purple with the sunrise and in the deep valley clouds obscure everything, sitting there under the sky-scraping coloured peaks so that when we emerge from these clouds it is like a dream, a crisp perfect dream that is blurred and almost forgotten in the morning. I have been there this week, with the rain, the rain that washes away and softens the trails. Yesterday could have been a summer day in Ushuaia...17 degrees!!! at least three maybe four days of the past week and a half I have trained in short sleeve shirt and no gloves... turns out that this time I picked the right place because Las Cotorras is the only xcountry trails with snow... all the rest have closed...
And today? more changes! I woke up with a stomach ache called in sick to work and now it is snowing a blizzard!!!
There is a David Bowie song about Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes - And that song is playing in my head. And I´m taking a day off from work and training (im sort of burnt out) and just sitting around watching the tour de france and preparing for the english classes im giving in the hostel...
These are the rapid succession of changes that solicited this blog - a rather boring one at that.
a note for skiers - yesterday the wind was so strong (they closed the downhill centre, must have been gusting close to 100km/h) that I had to offset into the wind on the flat!! and coming back the other way I free-skated, no poles!!
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